The difficulty I’ve encountered with feedback became particularly evident last Thursday when an employee who is leaving our company shared their thoughts with me. This feedback struck a deeper chord than most, causing a significant amount of discomfort. The pain didn’t stem from a misunderstanding or lack of information but rather from the realization that there were undeniable truths within their words.

Typically, it’s easier to dismiss feedback that clearly misses the mark. However, it’s far more challenging to do so when it contains a grain of truth. Another complex aspect of handling feedback is dealing with the influence of individuals who aren’t present. This is a situation we try to avoid by setting clear rules about giving feedback and addressing it when we’re on the receiving end. Unfortunately, once the feedback is given, the impact is often already made.

This experience has left me in a difficult position. On one hand, it’s clear that there’s a “kernel of truth” in the feedback that I need to address and work on. On the other hand, I’ve lost a valuable team member who cared deeply about me and contributed significantly to our team. And I cared deeply about them. That got lost.

While a lot of the feedback might have missed the mark, the loss of this team member and the valid points they raised are hard to ignore.